Orange cones and detour signs are objects that generally make us wince. Yet, they are there to protect us and to announce beautiful improvements to come. It’s the same spiritually!
In life, we often encounter all kinds of obstacles that force us to change our plans, detours we didn’t anticipate. And here too, we never face these trials with a light heart. Yet, these obstacles and detours are sometimes tools used by God to protect us or even to announce that something better will be built in our lives.
That is, in a way, what Romans 8:28 confirms. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (NIV). But often, for a difficult situation to “work together for our good,” we must view it as positive. If we complain about our trials, we won’t be able to see the miracle God is preparing after the trial. We can’t always avoid trials (Romans 5:3-4), but we can choose to view them as ways to build the character of Christ within us.
“But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit” (Jude 1:20 NIV). This verse tells us that we are to “build ourselves up,” but what are we supposed to build? Whatever God inspires us to do!
Building our faith Are you in the same place, spiritually, as you were last year? Have you gained new insights into the Word? Are you serving in a ministry at your local church? Are you more sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit? God wants to be more present in our lives, but He doesn’t impose Himself. It’s up to us to make room for Him, which often requires us to put other things aside. Salvation doesn’t depend on our efforts; it’s a free gift paid for by Jesus on the cross. But once we are saved, that’s when the effort must begin. “For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ” (2 Peter 1:5-8 NIV)
Building Our Self-Esteem God is the One who heals us. He heals the body, but also our soul, our emotions, and our self-esteem. But to receive this healing, to believe in our new identity, we have some work to do. In Isaiah 52:2 (NIV), the prophet encourages his people to walk in victory by untying their own bonds. “Shake off your dust; rise up, sit enthroned, Jerusalem. Free yourself from the chains on your neck, Daughter Zion, now a captive.” The verse doesn’t say that God loosens the bonds, but that she must untie herself. It’s our responsibility to forgive those who have hurt us, to let go of our past, and to believe in the wonderful attributes God says we have.
Building Our Social Network Living alone can sometimes become very comfortable. Going out to make new friends becomes quite a challenge. But God created us as social beings who need others. Those around us encourage us, and sometimes force us, to become better. “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17 NIV). We need to practice listening to others and understanding them, especially if we, as singles, one day want to get married. Let’s take the first steps and make the effort to contact our friends, help out in local organizations, and serve at our church. It’s often through our social network that we find a life partner, so if you want to get married, invest in your social network!
Building Our Singleness Singleness isn’t a disease to be cured or a problem to be solved. It’s not even a waiting period before marriage! You may indeed be waiting for someone to capture your heart, but that doesn’t mean your entire life is on hold. You have a mission to fulfill to grow the Kingdom of God while you’re single, a mission you may no longer be able to fulfill once married. So don’t wait to embrace your calling! Use your time as a single person to serve, to grow, to learn. You should be able to say on your wedding day, “I’m happy to get married, but I can say that I really also enjoy my time of being single.” If you’re not satisfied with your life as a single person, you won’t be either once married. So use your time as a single person to glorify God.
“But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit” (Jude 1:20 NIV). As the apostle Jude says, get out your tools (your Bible), don’t be irritated by the orange cones (your afflictions), and start building yourselves up today.
(This article is a summary of our conference on September 27, 2025. To listen to the conference in its entirety, click on this YouTube link.)