At the last Club-Passion374 meeting in Montreal, participants were asked to weigh in on the question: Is being single compatible with happiness? Their answers were so insightful that we had to share them.
From the outset, the single participants at the Passion374 Club meeting acknowledged that there is no absolute happiness on earth. It is only when we are in the arms of our Heavenly Father, in His paradise, that we will be truly, completely happy. Furthermore, marriage is not a guarantee of happiness, since even married people face challenges and sometimes experience great difficulties.
That being said, a single person who longs for marriage may sometimes feel further from happiness because of the emptiness they feel while searching for their “other half”. Family and social pressures amplify this feeling of emptiness, and therefore this impression that happiness lies in marriage. Seeing our friends thriving in their marriages doesn’t help combat this gloomy feeling either. (You see, you’re not alone in feeling this way; singles around the world face the same challenges!)
The exception to this rule, according to the discussion participants, are singles who have been blessed with the gift of celibacy or who have chosen to remain single, whether for a specific period or for the rest of their lives. These individuals are at peace with their singleness and don’t feel the emptiness of a partner. They certainly have their challenges, but they don’t suffer from this lack.
To avoid feeling depressed about this void, participants in our discussion suggested that single people engage in enriching activities. These activities can help fill the emptiness they feel and also allow them to make new friends, which could, of course, lead to marriage. Among the activities suggested during our discussion, volunteering was mentioned. That allows us to step outside our comfort zone, serve our community, and show compassion to those we care about.
Participating in Christian activities not only contributes to our spiritual growth but also helps fulfill our social needs. Especially when these activities are organized for single people. Even if it requires some effort and possibly a financial investment, these gatherings enrich our lives and help us, in a way, to find happiness. “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:11-13 NIV).
It is also important for single Christians to avoid comparing themselves to married people. Comparisons are one of the worst poisons to happiness. The Club members emphasized that we should be grateful to the Lord for our lives and not compare ourselves to others. “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18 NIV)
The participants in our club concluded that it is necessary to consider God’s work in our lives during this waiting period (Romans 8:28). This is another way to encourage us to keep the faith. “This waiting period is a beneficial preparation for us, because God uses our solitude to mold us in His image and make us pleasing to His will. But once again, we emphasize that there is no absolute perfection on earth. We will continue to learn when we enter into marriage,” summarized Rachelle Tessougue, one of the leaders of Passion374-Montreal.