Being a Christian single in a small town, even a village, can be discouraging. But is the location of where we live really an obstacle?
While in Saguenay, my husband and I asked Christian singles in the region what their biggest challenges were. According to them, what were the differences between a Christian single from a small town and one living in a big city? And they named three disadvantages: little choice, few services and lack of communication between churches. I smiled when I heard these arguments because it is the same reasons we hear from singles in big cities.
In short, no matter where we live, we all have obstacles to finding a partner. The task is not easy, it requires effort. How do you not get discouraged?
Start by asking yourself this question: does God really want you to be in a relationship? Are you convinced that you do not have the gift of celibacy?
Second question: Do you believe that God is able to find you a partner no matter where you live? Is He really powerful in your eyes? To have faith is to believe in someone, not in something. So, are you convinced that God is capable? “He did not waver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God, and being fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform” (Romans 4:20-21 NKJV). “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him” (Hebrews 11:6 NKJV).
You have faith in God, bravo! Now, do you have hope? There is a difference between the two in the Bible. “And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13 NKJV). Hope is to have an image in our head of the promise that God has made to you. In the Old Testament, they had the hope of the coming of the Messiah. In the New Testament, their hope was to have eternal life, to find their Lord Jesus. Their hope was the place or state they imagined reaching. The same is true for the hope of getting married.
We are not talking about positive thinking here. Hope must be based on a revelation from God, accompanied and confirmed by a verse in the Word of God. The personal promise that God has made to us is our hope. So, if you know that God did not give you the gift of celibacy; if you know that God is all-powerful and has a thousand ways to meet your need, and if you already see yourself married, and that your hope is based on a personal promise … all you have to do is continue to follow the direction of the Holy Spirit in all areas of your life.
So the big question is: are you following the direction of the Holy Spirit? Some singles complain that there are no potential partners in their city, but they never asked God if it was His desire for them that they live in this city! Do you live where you are because God told you to stay there, or just because you love the area, or your relatives are around? In the case of Abraham, the fruit of the promise was not in the land of his parents. “Now the Lord had said to Abram: “Get out of your country, from your family and from your father’s house, to a land that I will show you. I will make you a great nation; I will bless you and make your name great; and you shall be a blessing”” (Genesis 12:1-2 NKJV).
We are not all called to move, but we should at least ask God about it! Because if God calls you to live in a remote area, it is because He wants to use you there. And if He wants to use you there, it’s because He intends to bless you there. It is therefore essential to ask ourselves if we are where God wants us to be, in the church He wants us to serve, and in the ministry where our talents will make His Kingdom grow.
Finally, if you do not yet know what your calling is, start by evangelizing. It’s a universal calling! At least be a witness of His grace by being different (Romans 12:2) and sharing all the miracles that He does in your life. If we grow in number in our local church, admit it, it will also increase the choice of partners, while responding to God’s desire to see His kingdom grow.