(POST EDITED*) “No sex before marriage” is a principle strongly promoted by all Christian churches. Yet some people point out that there is no verse in the Bible that says we shouldn’t have sex before marriage. Is it right to believe that God reserved sex for marriage?
Yes, it’s true, there is no verse that specifically says to wait until marriage to have sex. Several passages speak of sexuality. God loves sex; He created it. He told Adam and Eve to multiply: and there is only one way to do that! But God clearly placed sexuality in a marriage context. In Genesis 2.24 (NIV), we read: “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” There is an order of things here: first, we depart from our parents, then we get married (is united to his wife), then the couple can become one flesh.
Whenever the Bible speaks of sexuality outside of marriage is in a negative way. It clearly condemns adultery (in the 10 commandments among others passages), bestiality, incest (in Leviticus), prostitution, rape, etc.
In fact, the only time God speaks about “becoming one flesh”, in an acceptable way, is in the context of marriage. Besides, when it talks about a young unmarried woman, the Bible often uses the term “virgin”. This clearly indicates what should be the status of the spouses on their wedding day! God has not said precisely to wait before marriage, but He clearly said that sexuality must be in the context of marriage. When God tells us that there is only one acceptable way, does He really need to mention that all other paths are not?
Paul agrees that the only acceptable way of having sex is through marriage. 1 Corinthians 7.9 (NIV): “But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
Why does God restrain sex to marriage? Some believe that sex must be protected by a lifetime commitment. Others believe that sex is something precious, a gift you only give to your spouse, and others think that sex is for reproduction only. Others will say that children need two united parents. Again, God doesn’t explain the reason why He imposed this boundary. However, God does not have to explain everything to us. God isn’t asking for our approval, He wants our obedience.
Since there is only one path, let’s follow it. In Hebrews 13.4 (NIV), Paul recommends that “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” If you have taken the wrong path, know that God’s grace is great, and true repentance gives you the right to a new life, a new beginning.
(* We rewrote this article to make the message clearer. Some readers felt that our first approach was confusing. The Internet is a great media! We can continually improve our work, so do not hesitate to give us feedback, we read all your comments with great interest.)